A dream is a wish your heart makes when you’re fast asleep. But it’s also a dream we can make as we think about our future, our basic needs wants and desires.
Ask anyone who knows me or partially knows me & they will tell you I’m a Disney fan. There is no hiding this fact. Disney cartoons shaped much of my own ideology and thought processes and by proxy Grimm’s and Anderson’s fairy tales. (Many of Disney’s cartoons are based on Grimm’s works and also that of Hans Christian Anderson)
Many of the Disney, and nowadays Pixar movies, are based on events set to put a hurdle in our hero’s way. A hurdle that will put them on their way to greatness.This can include losing a parent, losing a loved one, getting lost or separated from friends and family, or being confined by social normalities, prejudices and expectations. This sentiment is echoed by a fellow blogger called I’m just a dad with Disney questions. Many of his concerns are based on real, valid questions and concerns of whether showing Disney cartoons such as Tangled or Cinderella are healthy for his young daughter? Are they acceptable personifications of characters to be role model? or a true emulation for today’s modern world? based on the struggles we all face today.
For me I would argue yes. If we take Tangled to start with. Essentially, this is the story of Rapunzel. Rapunzel is a young girl who is locked in a tower by her mother to protect her from the dangers of the outside world. As I’ve grown I’ve learned to associate the tower with not only the boundaries the parents put in their child’s way of success but also that of the child. The child could, at any time have escaped the tower, in the same way that her gentleman callers enter the tower. But she doesn’t. Questions have been raised that surely this would have caused mental health issues and poor socialization skills. For me I see an introvert who preferred her own company to those that could have been provided by the outside world. However, those walls also built up an artificial fear of the unknown making it difficult to move forwards until someone was prepared to fight for her and give her confidence in her abilities to succeed away from the walls she had built.
If we transfer this to the working world and women in STEM environments. We build our own boundaries and walls. We pull ourselves down and put our own fears ahead of our own successes. We expect others to champion us but we won’t champion our own goals and desires. Yet when we do, we still belittle our achievements by associating them to being a team effort rather than taking the credit and thanking the receipt as expected. We constantly undermine our own successes and highlight our failings; thereby portraying a far less competent and capable individual than that of our colleagues. we need to have the confidence and aplomb to take the compliments with the grace they are intended. We should be highlighting these, to show the world what we can achieve, and succeed, when we don’t let fear drive our actions. Imagine how much further we could travel if we put a little faith in our own self-belief without putting our future in the hands of those around us.
I’m not saying we don’t need the help of our managers and our teams to help us. As this is where the support of mentors and sponsors can help drive both confidence and accelerate a career to the next level. But if we do not take control we will always be living behind the walls of fear and insecurity. We will always be locked away in our high guarded tower and protected walls. Just think how much more Rapunzel could have achieved if she was prepared to push a little harder and try to break down those walls earlier. Are you prepared to challenge the normal? Question the existing perceptions and look at braking down your own walls? And face your own fears to look at driving your own career forward.
At the end of the day a dream is only as good as the dreamer. Because if you only dream then all you will have is dreams. However, if you are prepared to fight for your dreams, take risks, break the rules and fight for what you want. You may find that you stop being Cinders and living amongst the ashes. But rise up to be Cinderella and find yourself running your own kingdom.
However, every dream as challenges and has Sheryl Sandberg points out in her Lean in book, careers are no longer based on a ladder and can be more aligned to a jungle gym. For me I prefer to see it as a giant board game of snake ladders.
Some times you will cruise along and climb a couple of small ladders and sometimes you will slip down a few small snakes taking you in a slightly different direction. Occasionally you may hit the big snake which you will take you right back to where you started or even further behind than where you were. In these instances you need to consider the lessons learnt and what you now need to move forward. If you are then lucky enough you may hit the giant ladder which will take you to the top of the board and a step away from your final goal. Or you may decide that this game is no longer for you and you want to play another one, such as monopoly or chess.
Either which way, your ability to have fun and enjoy the challenges and your ability to learn from your setbacks and come back stronger and fight harder will set you apart.
One thing all Disney Princesses and Pixar primary characters have in common is an unfailing belief is that there is a better way out there. The right path is just around the corner and if they keep working, dreaming and driving to get there, their dream will become a reality.
Therefore my simple message to you is keep dreaming. Believe in what you are doing. Have fun. Stay positive. If you don’t like what you see, change direction, change what you are doing. But doing nothing leads to nothing. It’s only by looking to change can we really make a change to our own world and therefore the people around us.
So keep dreaming. Keep believing. And remember a dream is only as good as the dreamer and your wishes will only come true if your heart is true and the dream is too.
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