Hello everyone!
Today there are probably more changes in our lives than we are able to process.
Processes are digitalised, the software of our devices changes without our intervention (or decision), there is climate change, migrations, ..
In the world of coaching, change is managed by reflecting on what is in our sphere of control and what is within our sphere of influence. Or outside of both.
Add to that the filter of what is important:
We cannot turn our attention to everything around us, the brain needs to prioritise and discard something!
When we focus on what is happening to us, about the results we get with what we do, we can think about the results as a consequence of our actions and actions as a consequence of our emotions, our thoughts and our beliefs.
If any change distresses us, sometimes it is because we feel threatened and the amygdala “is kidnapping us.” The branch of psychology called Neuroscience, explains that the neocortex is the part of the brain where we process rational thoughts and the amygdala where we manage feelings. (Obviously this is a simplification).
The most important thing about this explanation of neuroscience is that we sometimes react to what is happening to us directly with the amygdala, without using the rational part of our brain. This is bad because we often react disproportionately and without using many of the resources at our disposal.
When our lives are in danger, we do well to run away, fight or freeze. In other circumstances, the best we can do is take a deep breath and try to engage our rational thinking as soon as possible.
How is it done?
The recommendation I have heard most often is to do meditation regularly. Meditation is good practice for reacting by breathing deeply and beginning to direct attention to what is happening, for example counting breaths, trying to slow down breathing. Your goal at this point is to start using rational thinking and getting as much oxygen as possible.
“Everything can be taken from a man or a woman but one thing: the last of human freedom is to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” – Viktor Frankl (1905-1997)
This quote is one of my favorites. Victor Frankl wrote a book after surviving Auschwitz, “Man’s search for meaning”. He was a neurologist and found a way to direct his attention and manage his attitude in the most constructive way possible.
After all, we cannot change how a person(s) behaves or acts but we can change how we interact with said person(s).
Therefore the decision and the question we must ask ourselves is which action do we take, if any.
After all making no decision is still a decision.
If you want to contact me, remember that my address is ara.adipiscing@gmail.com
Until next time!
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